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Sunday, October 30, 2005


Me and mole hit the road again

Tuesday, October 25, 2005


I did because I wanted you to be free paintings


ta for nothing

I began to feel that freedom should beget freedom. But it did'nt work. In a way, the reverse happened, and the more involved I got in my painting, which subsequently led to many outside contracts and a lot of visitors and the writing of books, the less that I was liked in the community. The more I was different, the more I was rejected. And I finally had to realise that they were not interested in freedom. They were interested in the survival of the Benedictine Order and it particular in the survival of the Abbey. So the Kind of person they accepted became more and more the kind of person who would fit into the frame they wanted Meinrad Craighead (contemporary)

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Familiar acts are beautiful through love
( percy Bysshe Shelley 1792-1822)

Dress up, dance, laugh. I will never be able to throw Love out the window.
( Arthur Rhimbaud 1854-1891)


Sometimes red is what I feel

If i was to turn back
into you and tell you what I
and gave you
the opportunity to tell me what
you did
do you think we would
have made it?


ive been in love four times

Ive only been in love four times:will it happen a fifth time, and whats the change of it happening in New Zealand. looks like all the interesting men have cleared off. Im eating Pac and Save's easy butter chicken, naughty aye
anyway thursday night was a treat too. I drove, foolishly for 1.5 hours either way, from auck land to hamilton to see the French two piece weird ensomble : VIALKA, i managed to only get one song in,but what a joy. ive got the c.d. Excellent , very excellent.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

will this post?

Friday, October 14, 2005



I was good, i only smoked two cig's and had one beer last night. The night started kinda weird. my friend was worried that she was tarted up and i was looking kinda like some dimwit again all glasses and all that (though two guys did smile and say Gidday, though they seemed uncultured and thick) Anyway moving on, we sat in this cocktail bar, talking about ex boyfriends and all the problems asociated with being in our 30's and single, trying to convince each other we were okey and we would make it into a sterotypical shitty normal life........someday//////but not-now, waiting for the right man syndrome.
In the end we left and my friend was downhearted.......and then we bumped into this guy who went to elam art school and went to his house and watched, at his suggestion Ziggy stardust d.V.D That was a treat!

Thursday, October 13, 2005


shouldnt spend at the wharehouse

I went to the airport wharehouse and spent $100 on a new pair of curtains. The main dining room in this dam 1030s home, is a kacky green. everyday i sit in this room, with my chinese student ( who hardly understands english) and write and check my emails. This entry, by the way is not very interesting.....I went an saw what i thought were some beautiful silky curtains, but instead when I got home I discovered they were thin (though sold as lined) and see though. Anyway i hate them and Im going to try and get a refund. Im meant to be going out tonight, actually making an effort and putting on some nice clothes and going to the Viaduct area, the place where America's cup was held. Why do i bother... I wish i was smoking again......

Wednesday, October 12, 2005


sometimes i wonder where I am?

Its not easy to describe, but sometimes i wonder if im really here. ive been having flashbacks to london and wondering if actually im back in london, but living where another pacific island culture are living. It seems Im still faced with the same problems and Im still wondering what to do next? Ive discovered I'm probably not going to have a baby soon and that the man i expected to meet, when I came back from london doesnt exsist. It seems all the plans and all the forgotten bits have come alive and I feel like the pieces are coming together but not as I had anticipated. It is possible to let things unravel and trust that the future will be surpreme.This in itself will be a good learning.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005


corregated iron and kitchens

. I just got a brand new fence put down, to ensure some privacy in my front yard, which i enjoy and like....means the kids next door cant peer in, when I have my new bbq area.
the fence could look like this and a new kitchen could look like this. What upsets me is the price. Dam near millions. Im trying but I aint finding the way to get the money and sort it out and damed if i will be a prostitute to some man to pay for it...its


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